by Alexander Dunlop | Sep 18, 2018 | .
I want to tell you a story about Rena. When she first came to see me for coaching, she was 35 and feeling hopelessly depressed. She’s an Ivy League graduate and had a great job in the financial services industry. And yet, she felt like life was passing her by. All her friends were getting married and moving on. She felt left behind. She desperately wanted to find love but was, in her own words, “bitter and angry with men.” All the bad experiences, heartbreak, and disappointment she had had with men, she explained, would make any woman cynical and jaded. At the same time, she felt like she was getting too old for a man to like her. She felt like she wasn’t attractive anymore. Worse, she admitted she felt like there was something specifically wrong with her. “Love might be for others,” she said, “but not for her.” And yet, despite it all, she yearned to find her soulmate. Our work together progressed slowly. She challenged me at every turn. And at several points in the coaching program she was ready to quit. She proclaimed, “it’s not working! This isn’t working for me!” But to her credit, she returned to the work and, despite some initial resistance, was willing to look deeply within herself to see how she was creating reality in her own image. Her first big ah-ha moment came when she found out the full meaning of her cards to play. She realized she’s not playing a traditional game of love and that it’s OK for her to approach love differently than her...
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